Approaching
Life’s Transitions
by Vanesha Brown
I
am sure many of us have found ourselves in the position of the individual in
the picture above. One moment we are getting things done on time and are making
graceful strides in accomplishing the goals we have identified as part of our
life plan. The next moment we are doing a brisk jog until we look up and realize
we are actually running around like crazy trying to figure out how to make life
turn out the way we pictured. In these moments, feelings of hopelessness or
despair may materialize, and life can seem like a whirlwind from which we are
so far removed.
In the last few years, I experienced this
out-of-body experience when I clung to the idea that I held all control for the
outcome of situations that occurred in my life (lost relationships, school
performance, etc). I realized I took on this line of reasoning to ensure that I
knew where to place blame if things did not work out the way I predicted because
I was not comfortable with the unfamiliar or unauthorized periods of
transition.
However, life has proven to me time and
time again that there will be moments in which I feel I hold the reigns to control
and other moments when I might not have the slightest clue of what to do. I am
learning now that the biggest determinants of preserving the outline of my life
plan is how I allow my feelings of control or lack thereof to inform my decisions
or next steps.
Therefore, I believe how you position
yourself to approach a transition or period of change can foreshadow the experience
you incur. For example, if you approach your transition period in an
oppositional manner, it is likely that this period will not be a pleasant one
for you. I hope that you will keep this in mind as I leave you with the
following questions. How do you want to set the stage for transition? How will
you position yourself during your next period of change?
Also, check out the link below from
Psychology Today for some
great tips on making it through life’s transitions.
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